Thursday, August 31, 2006

The infamous Starbuck chewing gum incident

OK, so I'm now eight episodes into the Battlestar Galactica Season Two DVD boxset and - WOW - it's frakkin' amazing.

(Note to non-BSG fans: maybe skip this post, mmmm?)

I'm a big fan of this show, which in my opinion trumps rudely on the face of it's nice concept, sadly lucklustre 1970s predecessor; this Galactica reboot just has so much going for it - high concept, an engaging story arc, great characters, top notch effects, and Katee Sackhoff.

Hmmm?

Katee Sackhoff, the new Starbuck. She is hard as nails and has boobs and everything.

Which leads me nicely into something that I'm sure Marcosy won't mind me sharing with you. Something that I like to call the infamous Starbuck chewing gum incident...

Last year Marcosy and I went off, as we do every now and then, to indulge our nerdy tendencies at a Collectormania fair-thing in Milton Keynes; y'know the thing - it's like a sci-fi convention-slash-market in the middle of Milton Keynes shopping centre, so if you get bored you can wander off to Top Man to look at this season's latest fashions. Anyway, I wanted to meet Jolene Blalock (Star Trek: Enterprise's sexy Vulcan T'Pol), and Marcosy wanted to meet Katee Sackhoff (the aforementioned new Starbuck). Oh, I also met Uhura from classic Star Trek, went a bit wibbly in front of her, and probably looked like a complete spacker.

Where was I? Oh yes: Starbuck. So we queued up to meet her with our lovely glossy wipe-clean photos ready to be signed, and Katee looked all lovely with her hair and boobs, and was definitely being really charming with everyone who went up to her. Marcosy was ahead of me in the queue, and when it was his turn he walked up to her and exchanged a few words. After a short while I noticed that he held his hand out in front of him, palm up. I was intrigued to see Katee's happy-go-lucky expression gradually disappear, but I couldn't make out what was being said (it's also quite possible that Katee was rapidly punching a panic button under the table).

Anyway, she signed his picture, shoved it back towards him, sneered a bit, and watched him walk off with something approaching mild disgust. Then she looked at me, the smile reappeared, and she beckoned me forward for some pleasant banter about the show, a little bit of insider gossip, and something approaching mild arousal (mostly on my part *ahem* but it's also quite likely that she felt a special tingley bond between us).

With picture in hand, I wandered back to meet Marcosy.

"What did you say to her?" I asked.

"Well," he muttered. "I asked her how her day was going..."

"Uh-huh..."

"And I asked her if she was getting a bit bored..."

"Mmmm..."

"And I asked her if she was chewing gum, which she said she was..."

"Yeeeeeees..."

"And I asked her if it had lost its flavour..."

"Right."

"Which she said it had..."

"Oooooo-kaaay..."

Then Marcosy shuffled awkwardly a bit. "So I held out my hand and asked if I could have it."

I slapped my hand to my forehead. "You didn't?!"

"Yeah, I did. But she looked a bit put-off by that, and I asked if she thought that was a bit weird." He looked down at his signed Katee picture. "She said it was a bit. What's her problem?"

Quite frankly, I didn't know what to say to that.

16 comments:

Miss T said...

First!

Oh, my. What is it with dudes at conventions and the fascination with the boobs? Dora and I could share a few things about the last fan thingy we went too...

Are you talking about the blonde girl in the new Battlestar Galactica? The one that had short hair and then it got really long?

Dora and Tina said...

Ummm, I think it was pretty stupid to ask about her gum. I actually thought the story was going to end with him having the chewing gum on the picture.

He's lucky he didn't get glove slapped for that!

Tim said...

Yeah, that's her! Katee Sackoff!

And funnily enough I'm drinking a Starbucks now!

As for the boobs thing, well you should be blaming Carrie Fisher. That metal bikini in Return of the Jedi has a lot to answer for...

Tim said...

Sorry Dora, I wasn't ignoring you - your comment just popped up as I clicked publish. Lucky I didn't write SECOND! I'd've looked like a complete twonk.

Um, Katee looks mega-mega hard. I thought she was going to roundhouse him or shoot him or something. Or spit on him, but quite frankly he would've gotten the gum then, so that would've been a RESULT.

Dora and Tina said...

Lucky indeed.

Just a thought: What was he going to do with the gum? I mean, had he thought about if she did give it to him, what would he have done with it and where was he going to put it? Perhaps it turned out for the best that he didn't get a result.

Tim said...

Dora - I just checked in with Marcosy, and he said:

I was going to try and clone her using her DNA spit so I would have had my very own Starbuck with boobies or I would have put it in my mouth and started chewing and that’s practically the same as French kissing her.

I hope that clarifies the situation!

Miss T said...

Holy shit. Marcosy sounds like either:

A) The coolest dude ever
or
B) The funniest dude ever

Who would ask for someone's gum? Seriously? I would have peed myself with laughter if I was there.

Oh, and Tim, I am pretty sure that boobies existed before Carrie Fischer ever wore the metal bikini. We were just very good at keeping them under wraps. Then Princess Uptight gets all slutty with it, and things change. Now everyone needs to have a metal bikini and knee high leather boots in the closet.

This begs the question: What would you do if you had boobs for a day*? They really can be quite handy.

*I'm sensing a lot of showering and uneccesary lathering.

Dinah said...

And a related question: what would you do if, normally having boobs, you found yourself without boobs for one day? Boobs!

That's awesome, with the gum. I was pulling for him to get it!

Tim said...

Miss Haversham - Marcosy is both A and B. Well, he would be if I didn't come first on both counts. I am, as you might say, FIRST!!!!!

Boobs for a day... Hmmm... interesting question... There's definitely a blog post in there somewhere. Two words immediately come to mind: 'jiggle' and 'mini-trampoline'. Does 'mini-trampoline' count as one word? I don't know...

Oh, and I hope my boobs would be perky and perfect, not the sort of ones you need to pitch over your shoulder before leaving the house.

Dinah - in answer to your awesome question, you'd be boobless, which is quite an awesome word.

Let's all say it together:

BOOBLESS!

Again!

BOOBLESS!!

And if that didn't make anyone smile, you're inhuman and beyond salvation.

Oh, and I wish Marcosy had gotten the gum too. By the way, we should all encourage him to post his Farah Fawcett story as a comment too; that's beyond awesome...

Miss T said...

Marcosy, you need to publish the Farraf Fawcett story was a comment. Please! You public needs you.

I don't think I'd like to go boobless for a day. They come in such handy as a camoflague when deflecting the attention of predators. I'd spend the whole day looking for them.

Tim said...

Yes Marcosy - you need to regale us with the Farrah Fawcett story.

Do it.

DO IT.

(By Predators, do you mean the ones with laser sights and cloaking technology that bother Arnie?)

Miss T said...

Yes, but as well all know, Alien wins in the end....

Dora and Tina said...

...by glove slapping the predator down because that sort of thing is not appropriate or called for at work, rest or play*

He should have got the gum and I was thinking would he dare put it in his own mouth??? Obviously the answer is yes if given the chance. Cool.

*I have just eaten a Mars bar and can't stop thinking about the mars jingle

Tim said...

Miss Haversham - That's right, and do you know why? Because Aliens are WAAAAAY cooler than Predators. Way cooler. It's mainly because of the snappy second mouth. The acid blood is quite cool as well, though.

Dora - Yes, Marcosy would definitely have put it in his mouth. Definitely. He might've then moulded it into a tiny Katee, and named it as well. Then he would've chewed it a bit more.

I just bought some Mars bars!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

I know this is almost excrutiatingly late, but I have an excuse: I've been away since Friday (Yes, I know you posted this on Thursday - I'm slack as well!). I wasn't going to comment until your most recent post, but I couldn't help but think the 'incident' was going to end like this:

Marcosy had been affronted by Katee chomping away while talking & signing, so put his hand out for her to spit her gum out onto, while telling her that "nice girls don't chew with their mouths open. Spit it out. Now." then spitting on a handkerchief(sp?) and wiping it across her chops.

Tim said...

That could've happened... but remove the handkerchief. He'd just have licked her.

Probably.

I'll ask him. He does like the Katee!