Thursday, August 24, 2006

The amazing vibro-fridge

I've been off work this week; no particular reason, just wanted/needed some time off, and I liked the idea of tying it in with the Stones gig last Sunday, and the three day weekend coming up this weekend.

The initial plan was to decorate my bathroom. I even pulled some screw-plugs out of the wall that the previous owner had painted over. Actually, I pulled them out about three weeks ago, and I've been staring at the holes ever since and thinking that I should really get the poly-filler out and fill them in. I do like poly-fillering.

Anyway, the whole bathroom decorating thing fell by the wayside bacause I just couldn't be bothered. That's not to say that I haven't done my fair share of exciting things my friends! Oh, no - I've had a haircut (well, more of a trim to be honest; I'm still in the 'growing it longer' phase, and anyway, Inexplicable Device threatened to dare me to a duel if I cut it), and - can you contain the excitement?! - a financial review!


Annoyingly, though, there's been some micro-disasters in Sparky Towers. First of all, I noticed that some of the stitching had broken on my 'oh-so-comfortable-king-of-all-sofas' sofa; thankfully, a chap came round to stitch it back up today. He had a really long curved hook-needle thing. I swear if he'd said "I know what you did last summer" I would've shrieked and confessed to running over the mad fisherman and being infatuated with Jennifer Love Hewitt. He didn't, though, and we had an interesting conversation about Lost instead.

The most annoying holiday micro-disaster so far has involved my fridge freezer, however. I don't know exactly why... but it's started, erm, vibrating rather severely...

The thing is, it's making such a racket that it's actually louder than my TV. Which meant that on Tuesday, I had to watch Lost while leaning against the fridge door to keep the noise down. And it's lucky I don't have any cans of fizzy pop in there, because, quite frankly, they'd be a bit like Elvis now. And by that I mean they'd be all shook up, not face down on a shag-pile carpet with burger smeared over them.

So tomorrow, fridge man is coming to sort vibro-fridge out. At 8:00 am. Yes, in the morning. That is just not right. I'm on holiday - I shouldn't be made to get up at that time! That being the case, is it acceptable to just let fridge man act as my alarm clock, answer the door in a dazed state in my undercrackers and wrapped in the duvet, point out the offending vibrating applicance in the corner, and collapse face-down on the living room floor while he fixes it?

I don't know about you, but that sounds perfectly reasonable to me.


Dora and Tina said...

Some people may pay alot of money for anything that vibrates. But a vibrating fridge is something very special. You could charge entry to your home, just so people can lean on it.

You know there are people who would pay for that.

Dora and Tina said...

That comment makes it sound like I am one of those people.

And there is a part of me that would like to lean against it just to see how much the vibratness scale is...and some giggling may ensue.

Tim said...

Too late, Dora, too late! The vibro-fridge is no more!!

Though it's amazing muscle-relieving and pleasure-heightening abilities will be talked about for years to come!

On the otherhand, the virgin Mary just appeared in my toast. DAMN! That's another slice ruined!!