Sunday, December 31, 2017

Reading list 2017

It's that time of year when I defend myself once again for not blogging more consistently, or indeed, at all post all the books I've read throughout the year! And OH MY, what a year it's been. I think this has been the most books I've ever read in a single year since I started writing this dear old blog back in 2006, and I guess it pretty much explains why I've not blogged: basically, it would seem I've spent the entire year reading.

Anyway, I'll make my annual hollow promise to start blogging again in the coming year (who knows, this might be the one I actually follow through with it!) before digging out my dusty old jacket with the worn leather elbow patches, nudge my glasses up my nose (true story: I actually got some this year, but only for working on my computer, sadly not to look sexily intelligent as I'm sipping a latte in Starbucks) in order to run through the books of 2017 and give them an appropriate grade, from D- (you're trash) to A+ (I get a tingle in my special place). As usual I'll provide links where possible so you can purchase your own copy if you should so like, but honestly, do try and buy from an actual bookshop rather than the giant corporation I'm linking to; I only link to them because I'm impossibly lazy (hence no blogging).


01. Fight Club 2 by Chuck Palahniuk, illustrated by Cameron Stewart - A graphic novel sequel to Palahniuk's acclaimed novel and the film it spawned. This book picks up the thread of the narrator now married to Marla with a child, but it's not long before Tyler Durden resurfaces. It's a worthy and for the most part enjoyable follow up to the original, but one that is neither as clever nor as shocking: B

02. The Complete Peanuts 1950-2000 by Charles Schultz - The final volume in Fantagraphics Books' wonderful complete Peanuts collection looks back at all the bonus material, original art and other extras that Schultz created outside of the daily strips. It's a fitting conclusion to a beautiful series of books: A+

03. The Jekyll Revelation by Robert Masello (Kindle) - An enjoyable tale with two parallel storylines, one featuring Jekyll and Hyde author Robert Louis Stevenson in Victorian London amidst the horrors of the Jack the Ripper murders and the other focusing on a conservationist in contemporary California who finds Stevenson's diary. It's a fun, easy read, and one that's rather enjoyable as long as you surrender to the historical inaccuracies and liberties within: B

04. Tales of the Peculiar by Ransom Riggs - A companion volume to Riggs' acclaimed Miss Peregrine trilogy, this beautifully presented tome contains a number of short stories – best described as peculiar fairy tales – that were referred to throughout the author’s earlier books. An enjoyable read that adds an extra layer of detail to Riggs’ peculiar universe. I enjoyed it a lot: A-

05. How to Archer by Sterling Archer - No, seriously, the animated star of the TV show Archer is listed as the author. Regardless of who wrote it - and I veer strongly towards it actually being Sterling Archer because his voice comes across so well in the writing - this is an amusing guide to how to be the words greatest secret agent. Made me chuckle a lot: B+

06. John Carter: World of Mars by Peter David, art by Luke Ross - A collected edition that gathers together the four issue prequel comic book series to the 2012 movie. It's a fun story that unites characters from the film and gives a bit of backstory to them and their motivations prior to Carter's arrival on Barsoom: B+

07. A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole - A reread of one of my favourite books in a fancy new cloth bound hardback edition. Toole's farcical tale of the outlandish Ignatious J. Reilly's misadventures remains as hysterically funny as it was when I first read it almost 20 years ago. A genuinely brilliant read filled with colourful, memorable characters. I adore this book: A+

08. Star Wars: Catalyst - A Rogue One Novel by James Luceno (Kindle) - A prequel to the 2016 standalone movie Rogue One, Catalyst tells the story of Galen Erso's friendship with Orsen Krennic, the development of what will ultimately become the Death Star, and ultimately the manipulation that leads Erso and his family to escape into hiding before Krennic tracks the down at the beginning of the film. A solid read that adds some welcome backstory to the events of the movie: B+

09. The Moon Maid by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Kindle) - From the creator of Tarzan and John Carter of Mars, this story tells the tale of Julian 9th, an oppressed young man living in a time when Earth has been conquered by invaders from the moon. A quick read, and one that’s enjoyable enough but not quite as enthralling as the author’s Barsoom stories: B-

10. Pirates of Venus by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Kindle) - The first book in the author's Amtor series sees Earth man Carson Napier aim for Mars but end up on Venus, where he discovers a world full of strange creatures and adventure. A really fun, easy to read pulp novel that has similarities to Burroughs' John Carter stories: A-

11. Lost on Venus by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Kindle) - Book two of the Amtor series picks right up from the end of the first, with Carson Napier thrust into more peril and new adventures on the planet Venus. As fun as the first book: A-

12. Carson of Venus by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Kindle) - Carson’s story picks up in the third of Burroughs’ Venus books. In this adventure, Carson Napier finds himself once more separated from his beloved princess Duare, and caught in a war against the fascist Zanis. Another enjoyable tale of daring-do and fantastic adventure, but probably my least favourite of the series so far: B+

13. Escape on Venus by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Kindle) - The fourth Amtor novel sees Carson and his beloved Duare caught up in yet more adventures on Venus, from being captured by amphibian warriors to amoeba-type humanoids who want to keep them as exhibits in a museum. There's a lovely line of humour running throughout this book that was absent from the previous ones, and it helped this enjoyable tale take a step on from the set formula established in books 1-3: A

14. The Wizard of Venus by Edgar Rice Burroughs (Kindle) - A short novella rounds off Burroughs' Amtor series, with Carson of Venus and his friend Ero Shan finding themselves in a valley where a wizard is said to turn people into the Venusian equivalent of pigs. It's a slight tale, and maybe not quite a fitting send off for the series, but enjoyable nonetheless: B+

15. John Carter: A Princess of Mars - A very enjoyable collected edition of the comic book adaptation of Burroughs' first Barsoom tale. The artwork is striking if somewhat dark in places, and the tale rattles along at a fair old pace. Very enjoyable: A-

16. John Carter: The Gods of Mars - The second book in Burrough’s Barsoom series receives a graphic novel adaptation. The art isn’t as stylised as that of the previous book, but this makes it arguably easier to read if not quite as nice to look at. I did have some issues with the way some of the individual panels flowed on certain pages, but on the whole this was an enjoyable and easy read that captured the essence of the original book well: A-

17. Star Trek: Voyager - Full Circle by Kirsten Beyer (Kindle) - I decided to give Beyer’s first Voyager relaunch novel a go based on the fact she’s working on Star Trek: Discovery. It’s a good, solid tale that covers a lot of ground, from B’Elanna Torres dealing with an ancient Klingon order out to get her daughter to - SPOILER ALERT! - the death of Kathryn Janeway and the effect it has on Chakotay. I enjoyed, but don’t know yet whether I’ll race to read the next book and find out what happens during Voyager’s return to the Delta Quadrant…: B

18. Alien 3 by Alan Dean Foster - I threw out a copy of this book when I moved years ago and for some reason came to regret that decision in the years that followed. Fortunately, I found another copy and thoroughly enjoyed Foster’s novelisation of what I believe is a hugely underrated film: A

19. Aliens - The Original Comics Series: Nightmare Asylum and Earth War by Mark Verheiden - The second volume in Dark Horse’s beautiful series of oversized hardbacks repackaging the original comics that followed on from the 1986 movie Aliens. The stories in this edition see Newt and Hicks fall into the hands of a crazed military officer who believes the Aliens can be trained, and tell the tale of what Ripley has been up to in the intervening years: A

20. Star Trek: The Abode of Life by Lee Correy (Kindle) - An appalling Star Trek novel from the 1980s. The Enterprise is damaged and finds itself in orbit of a planet whose inhabitants think they’re the only life in the universe. A dull story, far too much exposition about how the alien civilisation works, and characters that don’t read like their namesakes. One of the very worst Trek novels I’ve ever read: C-

21. Hex by Thomas Olde Heuvelt (Kindle) - A brilliantly told story about a small town in North East America that has been held under the curse of a witch for over 300 hundred years. The witch appears throughout the town and is monitored by an agency called Hex. But things start to go badly wrong when the town’s youths rebel against the edict to leave the witch alone… One of the best horrors I’ve read in years: A+

22. The Lost City of Z by David Grann - I was intrigued by the true story of experienced Amazon explorer Colonel Percy Fawcett going missing while searching for a mythical city he believed existed in the middle of the dense jungle, but hesitated as I’m not a big fan of non-fiction. I needn’t have worried: this book is a superb exploration of Fawcett’s life and passion, and the author’s own fascination with the story is imbued in every page. Wonderful: A+

23. Summer Morning, Summer Night by Ray Bradbury - A collection of some of Bradbury’s short stories. This was my first exposure to the author’s work and while it was a reasonably charming and quick read, I don’t necessarily feel the need to delve further into his back catalogue: B-

24. Alien Covenant by Alan Dean Foster – A decent, well-written novelisation of the most recent Alien film. There's nothing beyond what you saw on cinema screens, but it's a good story, realised well here in prose. Basically, if you enjoyed the film I imagine you'll enjoy the book: B+

25. Invincible Ultimate Collection Vol. 11 by Robert Kirkman - Volume 11 sees Mark having hung up his Invincible costume and retired to a planet with his wife and child - but of course trouble finds him, most notably here when an alien transports him to a time just prior to him becoming Invincible. A decent enough read, but the series has taking a notable downturn in quality over the last couple of volumes from the fresh and exciting stories it used to tell: B-

26. The Fisherman by John Langan - A beautifully told horror novel split into two parts, one in a contemporary setting, the other a hundred years earlier. Truly unsettling in places and vividly realised, this is a brilliant book: A

27. Aliens: Bug Hunt (Kindle) - A short story collection focusing on the colonial marines from the Alien films. There's a couple of gems hidden in this book, but for the most part I found the stories here poorly written and underwhelming: C

28. Dark Knight Returns: The Last Crusade by Frank Miller and Brian Azarrillo; art by John Romita Jr - A prequel to Miller's legendary Dark Knight Returns, this tale tells the story of what caused Batman to retire, and what happened to the last Robin at the hands of the Joker. It's a slight tale, which is a shame as there's so much more story here to be told, but there's just about enough to keep you enthralled across its all too brief length: B

29. Hekla's Children by James Brogden (Kindle) - Four kids go missing during a school trip to a country park, and only one is found, leading to a mystery that involves passage to another world and an ancient demon out for revenge. A good, solid read that kept me engrossed throughout: B
30. Dick Tracy Goes to War by Max Allan Collins - I’ve long wanted to read this book sequel to the 1990 movie, and after hunting down a secondhand copy I’m pleased to say it didn’t disappoint, with the famous detective hunting down a Nazi gang who’ve infiltrated his home city. A cracking crime read: A+

30. Dick Tracy Goes to War by Max Allan Collins - I’ve long wanted to read this book sequel to the 1990 movie, and after hunting down a secondhand copy I’m pleased to say it didn’t disappoint, with the famous detective hunting down a Nazi gang who’ve infiltrated his home city. A cracking crime read: A+

31. Dick Tracy Movie Adaptation (graphic novel) - At the time the movie came out 27 years ago three graphic novels: two prequels and an adaptation of the film, the latter of which I never got to read. All these years later I finally get my hands on it and… it’s a perfectly serviceable comic book version of the film, but nothing more: B-

32. Star Trek: Boldly Go Vol. 1 - The first volume of the post-Star Trek Beyond adventures of the Enterprise crew. It’s a fantastic start with the crew encountering the Borg – a storyline that could’ve been cliched but turns out remarkably well in the hands of the series’ creative team: A

33. Tarzan of the Apes by Edgar Rice Burroughs - The classic tale of the English lord brought up in the jungles of Africa by apes. It’s a really rather fun story, dramatic, engaging and much darker than the hundreds of television and film adaptations over the years would have us believe: A-

34. Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets by Christie Golden - Novel adaptation of the recent Luc Besson film, itself based on a series of classic French comic albums. It’s a solid read and one that has made me want to catch the movie, but I can’t help feeling some sequences were dragged out far too long simply to pad out a somewhat slight storyline: B-

35. Star Trek: Discovery – Desperate Hours by David Mack - The first novel focusing on characters from the latest Star Trek television series goes back to a time before the series’ first episode to show the crew of the U.S.S. Shenzhou dealing with a planetary threat alongside the crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise under Captain Pike’s command. A great start for Discovery in print: A

36. Dick Tracy Meets his Match by Max Allen Collins - The third and final of Collins’ Dick Tracy novel trilogy after the movie novelisation and Dick Tracy Goes to War. This tale sees the famed detective trying to marry his beloved Tess Trueheart on a live TV show, only for a sniper’s bullet to throw things into disarray and lead to a web of intrigue and murder. It took me a long time to track down a copy of this book at a reasonable price, but it was well worth it – I devoured it in a day, and can only hope that the fourth book hinted at in the author’s foreword might still some day make it into print: A+

37. Alien Covenant: Origins by Alan Dean Foster - A prequel novel to the recent movie (and Foster’s novelisation); the events of the book take place before the launch of the Covenant, meaning there are no actual aliens in the book. Instead, the antagonist is a group of humans intent on preventing the launch of the colony ship for fear it will lead to ‘demons’ finding their way back to Earth. An enjoyable enough read, but one that feels rather slight in story and overly long in places: B-

38. John Carter: The End - A graphic novel that is basically the John Carter equivalent of Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns. Here we find an elderly Carter dragged back into action one last time to save his beloved Barsoom. A solid read, although I found the art a little confusing in places: B+

39. The Hangman, the Hound and Other Hauntings by Thomas Corum Caldas
- A book detailing real life haunted locations throughout Wales. There were a few typos and errors throughout that could’ve been avoided with a good run through by an editor, and some sections were rather poorly written, but overall this is a charming little book that I devoured in a just a few days: B+

40. The Autobiography of Jean-Luc Picard by David A. Goodman (Kindle) - Following on from the author’s bio of Captain Kirk, this book uses an identical format to delve into the life of The Next Generation’s iconic captain. It’s a very enjoyable book, but I was surprised to find the events of the series and the TNG movies that followed were crammed into the last quarter; Insurrection, for example, doesn’t even warrant a mention. Overall, though, this is a treat for TNG fans, and Picard’s voice is reflected clearly in Goodman’s words: A-

41. Shadow on the Wall by Jonathan Aycliffe (Kindle) - A wonderful, haunting tale of an ancient evil that is reawakened during restoration work in an isolated church. There’s no sudden scares in this book, just a disquieting sense of growing malevolence that builds from page to page. I thoroughly enjoyed this perfect spooky tale: A

42. The Lost Village by Neil Spring (Kindle) - A follow-up to Spring’s debut novel, The Ghost Hunters, featuring the return of Harry Price and his former assistant, Sarah Grey. An enjoyable read with some spooky moments as Price and Grey investigate the possible haunting of a ruined village, but not quite as chilling as the author’s last book, The Watchers. That said, it’s still an effective page-turner: B+

43. The Lost by Jonathan Aycliffe (Kindle) - Something of a modern take on the Dracula take but with its own unique spin that makes it standout from Stoker’s classic tale. Like Shadow on the Wall, this is a story that steadily builds with malevolence page by page until the true horror is revealed: A-

44. The Massacre of Mankind by Stephen Baxter (Kindle) - Baxter’s authorised sequel to the classic H.G. Wells novel War of the Worlds is, for the most part, a cracking tale of a second Martian invasion – this time taking place across the planet Earth rather than being confined to England. There were some instances where I felt the narrator’s tale dragged slightly, but on the whole this was a thrilling read that compliments the original admirably: A-

45. Groo: Friends and Foes, Vol. 3 by Sergio Aragones and Mark Evanier - Third and final book in the Friend and Foes saga sees the witless warrior finally aid a young girl in tracking down her missing father, with plenty of frays and fun along the way. A fitting conclusion: A

46. Batman: The Dark Knight - Master Race - The second sequel to Frank Miller’s classic Dark Knight Returns sees the legendary creator team with a number of other acclaimed comic writers and artists to pit the ageing Batman against a new Kryptonian threat. Better than The Dark Knight Strikes Again, but falling short of the giddy heights of storytelling success achieved by the original. Enjoyable enough, but I’d hope this is the last Dark Knight story: B-

47. Predator: The 30th Anniversary Collection by Mark Verheiden - A weighty deluxe hardcover collection made to stand alongside the Dark Horse Aliens volumes. This book contains the trilogy of stories that find a New York detective drawn into conflict with the titular Predator as he attempts to find out what happened to his brother Dutch (yes, the Arnie character from the first movie): A

48. Comet in Moominland by Tove Jansson - A beautiful new edition of the first Moomin novel. A whimsical, joyous tale that was as enchanting for this grown-up reader as it has been to generations of children: A

49. Dick Tracy Vol 1: 1932-1933 by Chester Gould - A wonderful first volume of Gould’s earliest Dick Tracy newspaper strips. Not the famed detective’s best stories, but a fascinating insight into his formative years: A

50. Asterix and the Chariot Race by Ferri and Conrad - The first Asterix book I’ve read from the new creative team and it’s... fine? This latest album has a decent enough story, is illustrated well and the gags are still there, but it’s lacking a certain charm that the older Asterix books had in abundance: B-

51. Finn Family Moomintroll by Tove Jansson - the second of Sort Of Books beautiful new Collectors’ Edition Moomins hardcovers reveals what happens when the Moomins discover the magical hobgoblin’s hat. Utterly charming: A+

52. The Memoirs of Moominpappa by Tove Jansson - another wonderful Moomins Collectors’ Edition, which tells the backstory of the Moomin patriarch. Not my favourite of the Moomin stories, but still a wonderful story: A

53. Moominland Midwinter by Tove Jansson - Moon adventures in the depths of a cold winter as Moomintroll unexpectedly wakes up from hibernation and has to contend with his first snow and the arrival of many guests to Moominvalley. Another charming tale - with some surprisingly adult themes - from this master storyteller: A+

54. Two Moomin Stories by Tove Jansson - A delightful little book containing the Moomin tales The Invisible Child and The Fir Tree, with proceeds from its sale going to Oxfam in support of empowering women and young girls. A wonderful book for various reasons, then: A

55. Behind You by Brian Coldrick - Wonderful collection of ‘one-shot horror stories’ featuring spooky illustrations and one simple line of text to accompany them. Effective, chilling and beautifully done: A

56. Star Trek: Waypoint - A great graphic novel collection of short stories set in the various eras of the Star Trek universe. Thoroughly enjoyed all the tales contained within, especially the Star Trek Phase II story that rounds off the book: A

57. Roughneck by Jeff Lemire - A brilliantly told and beautifully illustrated graphic novel in which a shamed former hockey player finds himself reunited with his sister who is fleeing from an abusive partner. The story is well told, the artwork never anything less than stunning, with its sparse use of colour being particularly effective: A

58. The Terminator: Tempest and One Shot - Great oversized hardcover that fits in perfectly with Dark Horse’s earlier Alien and Predator volumes, and which contains comic stories devised before the Terminator 2 movie. A fun read: B+

59. The Art of Star Trek: The Kelvin Timeline by Jeff Bond - A lush oversized hardback featuring beautiful concept art from the three latest Star Trek movies. The text is slight but the images talk for themselves. An essential purchase for fans: A

60. Eight Ghosts - A wonderful collection of short stories by various authors, all of which tell ghost tales set at real locations maintained by English Heritage. And as if the stories themselves aren't haunting enough, the book also features a section that lists real ghostly experiences at some of English Heritage's locations around the country: A

There we go then - 60 books on the head! If only I'd read a little quicker and added another nine on top we could've all rounded off the year sniggering at 69. Infantile? Perhaps. Maybe next year?

Have a happy, healthy and wondrous 2018. Maybe, just maaaaaaybe, I'll see you back around here a little sooner than next December 31st…

Wednesday, February 01, 2017

The tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth

Last week I was strolling around Waitrose and I decided I fancied some camembert; fancy as in I wanted to eat some, not that I became strangely romantically entangled with a piece of cheese. So I picked some up, popped it in my basket and a few minutes later I'd bought it.

The next day I decided that I quite liked the idea of having some of the camembert for lunch so I took the packet out of the fridge - noting at the time a rather distinct aroma - opened it, carved a bit off, lit a candle because this stuff REEKS, and began eating.

I mean, seriously, every time I open the fridge I have to spark some incense or something because this stuff is aggressive.

Anyway, that's not what this tale is about. Because a couple of minutes after eating the cheese I noticed a tooth at the back of my mouth felt a bit… weird.

Now, strictly speaking I should blame the Kitkat I had after the cheese because that's way harder than camembert, but I love Kitkats, don't want to blame them for any of the world's troubles, and the cheese just smells.

So I sit there for a few seconds running my tongue around the back of my mouth thinking that it's just food wedged down in the tooth and I can probably pry it off if I really go at it like a high-schooler furiously making out behind the bike sheds, but after a while I start to get that mounting sensation of dread - so much so that I had to pause the episode of Supernatural I was watching and peg it upstairs to the bathroom. There I start brushing my teeth, certain that in a few seconds I'll have dislodged the offending mass and everything will be fine.

Everything was not fine.

Opening my mouth I look back and see and big old lump of tooth has just, like, gone.

Gone as in it's no longer anywhere in my mouth, which means I've swallowed it.

At this point I start fretting and here's why: I *hate* dentists.

Seriously. Pretty much from the moment I was old enough to make the decision myself I've not been. Which is weird, because when I was a kid I had the loveliest dentist and never needed any working doing. That said, he used to have a load of those little furry clip-on toys that used to be everywhere in the eighties attached to his lamp and I always worried one would fall off, straight into my mouth and I'd choke, so I guess there's a reason for my paranoia.

Anyway, at this point, even though the tooth doesn't hurt and I can stab it with my tongue and drink tea and eat and it only feels weird when I do touch it I decide there's two courses of action:

1. Leave it and hope it gets better.
2. Go to a dentist.

I know I'm grown up now because I actually decide on option 2, even though option 1 was mightily appealing.

Finding a dentist on a Friday afternoon when you've not had a dentist in years is a fraught experience, reader. Especially so when you're trying to find an NHS one and the closest appointment they can give you is in April. And this is why I ended up going to a private dentist, because not only were they reasonably affordable, but they were just a short walk from Sparky Towers and had a rather nice, professional looking logo so I reasoned they must be good.

So at an ungodly hour on Monday morning I rock up to the dentist and fill in a registration form; under the section asking 'do you have any medical conditions we should know about' I write 'I'm absolutely terrified of dentists (sorry).'

A short time later a lovely lady approaches me and introduces herself. We'll call her Susan. "Nice to meet you Susan," I say. She smiles and replies "you don't really mean that, do you?"

Susan leads me to her chamber of horrors and asks me to perch on the seat. I explain what's happened and she doesn't chastise me for not going to a dentist in 847 years. Then she asks me to swing my feet up and she begins to lower the chair. At this point I go rigid with fear because the sensation of the chair tilting makes me feel like I'm going to be waterboarded, or simply slide off the chair and shatter into a thousand tiny pieces on the floor. Above me is a flatscreen television showing a piece on BBC Breakfast about Brexit, as if I wasn't already terrified enough.

After a quick look in my gob Susan says I've done remarkably well for someone who's neglected their dental health for such an obscenely long time. Then she pulls out a wand with a camera attached and, replacing the BBC Breakfast Brexit piece on the television begins to take me on a guided tour of my mouth. If it wasn't for the fact she had two fingers and a camera in my mouth I would've asked if she could change the channel back to the Brexit piece and as lovely as this all was, could she just fix what needs fixing and leave me feeling blissfully ignorant.

Susan says the damaged tooth just needs a filling and I almost explode. I've never had a filling in my life and I suddenly feel a sense of unexpected shame. Then Susan injects me and half my face goes numb.

"If at any point you want me to stop," she says, "just raise your hand."

I raise my hand.

"I haven't started yet," she says.

I then decide to sit on my hands because otherwise she'll be stop-starting more than a worn out 1984 Ford Escort.

At this point I'm just one big massive rigid piece of man-shaped tension, which is ironic given that I'm always telling people in yoga classes to let the tension go and relax. I try practicing what I preach, but I just start vibrating.

Anyway, Susan goes about doing her thing and I'm a very brave little boy until that moment right at the end where the woman holding the suction thing turns away for a second and my mouth fills up with water and I choke a bit.

"Oh, looks like we hit your gag reflex there," says Susan smiling.

I BEG YOUR PARDON SUSAN I telepathically convey because my mouth is otherwise occupied and my face half numb.

Susan then announces we're done and asks if I want to see what she's done. I don't, and tell her I'll review her handiwork later at my leisure, once the trauma (and the anaesthetic) has worn off. Part of me is hoping that she's going to give me a lollipop for being so brave, but I guess that goes against the whole trying to avoid getting any cavities thing.

So there we have it. I now have my first filling. And it's all because of some stinky camembert and definitely not because of a Kitkat. Bloody cheese. Oh, and Big Bro just keeps asking me if I've poo'd out the offending shard that snapped off. So far the answer is no, but now I'm terrified it's going to lacerate my bottom when it finally does depart. Such trauma.



I took me 24 hours to summon up the courage to check out Susan's work and the woman is a genius. She's the Michelangelo of dentistry. I'd take a photo but I've got an iPhone Plus and I can't fit it in my mouth.