Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Sugar tits

I was admonished once again by Marcosy today for going longer than, ooo, 12 minutes, without posting a new entry. But at the end of the email he called me Sugar tits, so I think we're best buds again now.

Although I'm not too sure I'll be changing the blog name to Sugar tits Malarkey anytime soon.

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Ooo, excitment (she wrote) today - I've only been and gone and spread my malarkey to the XFM website! How so, I hear you say! Well here's how:

Cutting a long story short ('cos me chips are nearly done in the oven) drivetime presenter Richard Bacon was bitch-slapped a bit after his show on Monday, and they've been posting pictures of his injuries, along with a couple showing what he looked like pre-bitch-slap, on the website. Well one of these photos looked hideously like the dearly departed lead singer of Queen, Freddie Mercury to me.

So I booted up photoshop and tickled the picture.

And here it is.

Uncanny, huh?

OK, so it's not the best bit of photoshoping I've ever done, but I was caught between making a cup of tea and farting about on the internet, so... whatever!

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Right - must go: I'm off to a wedding party tonight (I bought new shoelaces especially) which is being held in Richmond Park of all places. No doubt the rutting deer will try to moleste me in the dark; if any Suger tits Malarkey kicks off I'll post it up tomorrow.

Lock and load!

8 comments:

Miss T said...

All I can say that I hope you are wearing a Freddy Mercury outfit with Nipple Tassels for you sugary delights to this curiously timed mid-week wedding party.

Tim said...

Alas not on the Mercury front - you never know when you might have someone's eye out with a misplased tassel-twirl. And everyone was hideously well-behaved, thus depriving me of a quality blog entry. What's that all about?!

As for the mid-week thing, both the bride and groom are teachers so they're currently on their goddamned six week sodding holiday. Some of us left early to ensure we're in work tomorrow morning!

Bah!!

Miss T said...

Those damned teachers and their fantastic holidays!

I can't believe people were well behaved at a wedding party! I guess it's up to the actual wedding for someone to be drunkenly crying "I don't want to die alone!" under the table.

Tim said...

I know! Once I'd crawled out from underneath the table and dried my eyes I expected to see at least one bridesmaid with her dress over her head screaming "WHO'LL DANCE WITH ME!?!" while throwing chunks of cake at random guests!

But, alas, it was not to be.

(Note to self: spike the punch with absinthe next time)

Look at that - I've used the word 'alas' in two separate comments...

Dora and Tina said...

Sugar tits. Hehe.

You know you have to go through with the name change now, don't you? Don't make blog related promises you can't keep!

Also, continue using 'alas' - it gives your comments an extra something.

Tim said...

Alas I shall remain Sparky! But if anyone wants to call me Sugar tits it might be quite nice every now and then...

Miss T said...

Sugar tits it is. But only if I get to be The Duchess Pork of Spork.

I am going to make a concerted effort to call Dora Sugar Tits today....

Tim said...

Duchess Pork of Spork, High Priestess of Smut you are! We should work up a coat of arms. Not literally a coat made of arms, mind, more like a royal seal. Not an actual "arf arf" seal, but a - oh, you get the idea!!

I'm picturing it now - you call Dora Sugar tits, she responds with "you hot ticket!" then you both shout "SPACKER!" (which is my new favourite word), and fall over laughing, preferably onto a child, who Dora can then yell at for getting in the way!

It'll be great!