Friday, October 13, 2006

El Deanio time

I was looking forward to today for one very good reason: today was the day I was meeting up with El Deanio for the first time in a long time, and for the first time since he'd become a daddy. 'The Daddy,' you could say - to the cutest little baby on the planet, I might add.

Anyway, I went prepared; in league with Yaz, I spent lunchtime perusing Shepherds Bush's finest sports shops looking for baby trainers as a belated gift. I settled on a pair of Nike Racer Low with velcro straps (makes El Deanio's life easier, I figured). They're a tad to big for the little fella, but I figured El Deanio has already got him some trainers in his current size, and as I doubt he'll be getting any smaller these give him something to grow into. The shop assistant was not amused when I asked if I could try them on.

Anyway, here's what they look like with a Starbuck's mug (grande size) for comparison):


So in late afternoon I wandered up town (second time this week - must be some kind of record!), and met El Deanio in Baker Street. I was "winding my way down to Baker Street," as Gerry Rafferty might say.

It was awesome - it was genuinely like we'd only seen each other last week, when in fact it's been a year. We had a Nandos, then wandered through town a bit. And El Deanio, who is renowned for dispensing profound statements on such a regular basis that we once covered an entire notice board with them (when one of Jack Nicholson's teeth was auctioned a few years back he commented "You want the tooth? You can't handle the tooth!") proved just how happy he is to be a dad when he said "You don't know love till your son has pissed on your Paul Smith suit."

That, my friends, is definitely the sign of one proud parent.

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My car up and announced yesterday that it wants to be serviced. Not in that way, you dirty buggers! No, it wants its oily bits checked (don't we all?). Anyway, I phoned up the dealer today, and was damned lucky to find that they can actually get me a courtesy car sooner than about four years away! Yes, I can have one the week after next - amazing! (Just goes to show that when I moaned last time someone actually paid attention).

Anyway, I drive a Mini. And do you know what sort of courtesy car I'm getting?

Another Mini, you say?

No.

I'm getting a BMW 5-Series.


That's right - a big-ass uber-powerful executive barge that's about twice the size of my Mini! Awesome-squared!!

Now I do love my Mini SOOOOOOO MUCH, but I also love the chance to drive other cars, specifically other people's cars, safe in the knowledge that I can give them back at the end of the day and get my car back all washed and shiny. And the 5-Series is going to be sweet... I'm sorely tempted to take the day off work and just drive it around West Londinium.

Bitchin'.

10 comments:

Miss Smuggersham said...

First!!

Seriously, take the day off! And take lots of photos!

Tim said...

It's tempting!!

Devine Dora said...

You should wear a hat that says "Rock out with your cock out" simple because driving that car you should be able to get away with things like that.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Remember to turn your Arrogance Factor up to full, and have a smug sneer at the ready for all those pitiful losers in plebian automotive transport.

Tim said...

Dora - Really? I'm already thinking I should wear a shirt and smart shoes at the very least. A grown-up BMW does suggest that one should portray at least a certain sort of attitude.

And as Inexplicable Device says, it's usually "nobwit."

Inexplicable Device - I shall be endeavouring to drive the Five as responsibly and courteously as possible so as to show that not all BMW drivers are nobwits. Unless some old bid in a Fiat Panda gets in my way in which case I'll chase her down the road and force her into a ditch.

Muwahahahaha!!!

skillz said...

Will you be wering driving gloves and listening to Lighthouse Family when driving around in the beemer?

Tim said...

Hopefully not - but you never know how these sort of things will affect you.

The gloves I could manage... the Shitehouse Family... Well, they're another matter!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Even if the old bid doesn't get in your way, you should run her off the road anyway! Oh what fun...

Dinah said...

There are just so many possibilities with this car. Oh, I am so excited for you.

And those shoes are way too cute.

Tim said...

Inexplicable Device - Hee hee, I was thinking exactly the same thing!

Dinah - I know! I might just pull up outside someone else's posh office and start barking orders at people. The 5-Series does say something, and that something, I believe, is 'important.'

Aren't the shoes just adorable? I put them on my fingers and recreated the little dance thing that Robert Downey Jr did in Chaplin.