Thursday, January 18, 2007

A mighty wind blew

And it wasn't because everyone had beans for dinner, either.

Good grief! The weather over the last couple of days has been insane!! Yesterday I actually got completely drenched walking from my car to the office, which as you probably didn't know unless you stalk me each morning isn't really that far; I looked like I was about to take part in a wet t-shirt competition and had doused my trousers just for the hell of it.

And then today it's been four-million mile per hour winds. Seriously, I walked down to Starbucks at lunchtime and felt like I was being aerodynamically-tested in a wind tunnel (official scientific data reveals I'm 'lithe'). That said, it was quite funny sitting in Starbucks watching people go flying down the road while I drank coffee and laughed at them; one woman saw me laugh at her, but I was totally like shrugging at her, as if to say 'what are you going to do about it?' Anyway, if the situation had been reversed I just know she would've been giggling into her decaf soy latte with a shot of hazelnut as I was blown past the window.

There have only been two really annoying things from my point of view - firstly, it's been playing havoc with my hair (the wind, not laughing at pedestrians, I should say), which has led me to the realization that it really needs a cut. I'm not too sure in what stylistic direction to go, but I'm erring towards the old school (skool?) short 'n ruffled look. Whatever I decide I need to act quick, because I've just hit that length where I get the sort of flick-ups that are only sported by four year-olds and mentalists and seem to be resistant to whatever product I slap on. (Stylistic suggestions gratefully received)

The second annoyance is that the office door seems to be sticking open about yay much (and by yay much I mean about 10 centimeters). This is annoying because the breeze gets in and I get chilly legs - which was particularly distressing yesterday when I had wet trousers. Unfortunately, no one else seems to have noticed, leaving me having to get up every few minutes to shut it. At one point I even combined my latest musical obsession for Panic! At the Disco with an attempt to make others aware by singing "haven't you people ever heard of closing the god-damn door?" but this failed on several counts, most noticeably that the song coming on the radio didn't necessarily coincide with the door being opened, and when it did everyone just came to the conclusion that I was simply a jolly little fellow singing along to the radio in the corner.

My final attempt to raise awareness for my plight came in the form of a politely-worded email, but again no one seems to be paying much attention, possibly, I fear, because in my haste to tap it out I misspelt 'draught' as 'draft.'

11 comments:

Tara said...

Now that would be entertaining; to be able to sit down and sip on coffee while watching people struggle with the wind. It's also amusing and a little sadistic to watch people slip on ice and snow. Not funny when it happens to you, but funny as hell to watch it happen to someone else.

Dinah said...

Maybe you should start a wet trousers competetion.

No?

Miss Smuggersham said...

You need to annoy people into shutting the door. Like get one of those croaking frogs that make a racket until the door is closed. Or.... you could get a talking cookie jar. That'll just annoy everyone.

Re: hair. Ummmm. I don't know much about boy hair. There's not much in the hair magazines to look at. Franz Ferdinand (the band, not the duke) hair seems to still be fashionable. Personally, I think hair is all about the path of least resistance.

Tim said...

Tara - Oh, it was! Initially I tried to hide my smiles, but then I thought 'why should I?' It was all good fun!

I'm with you on the ice and snow thing - there's nothing like a comedy ice-stumble!!

Dinah - Maybe I should... although I'm not sure if the market is quite ready for it yet; we live in such prudish times.

T-Bird - I might start throwing things - like mugs, keyboards, and chairs.

Hmmm... Franz Ferdinand hair...? Thanks for the suggestion, but I think I'll pass! As for the path of least resistance, you're spot on there - if I wake up and it looks fashionably ruffled, fashionably ruffled it is staying!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

I think we need a pic of the hair in it's current style, or should that be state? Then we can judge and advise.

And, 'lithe' is a terribly underused word these days!

Tim said...

Yes, I think 'state' is the right word! I'm not sure inflicting a pic of it on you would be the wisest course of action. It's a little bit too Episode IV 'Skywalker' to go publishing pictures, I think...!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Oh. I see.

Then might I suggest the short and ruffled look but, perhaps, not so short at the back. Not a mullet, mind, just a little bit more hair than the norm?

Or you could have a Lionel Blair cut, like mine! (It's not, of course - I just wanted to say that).

Tim said...

Yes, I think a little longer - not mullety - in the back. Hmmm... that certainly seems a good compromise.

But now i'm intrigued by the Lionel Blair!! What!? Better than Cherie Blair, I s'pose!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Don't you remember that lager advert, Harp? It could've been cider, though... Anyway, for some reason, someone with spikey gelled hair says "You could have a Lionel Blair cut, like mine", and the ad's 'star' says "But Lionel Blair doesn't have his hair cut like yours", then Lionel Blair walks in and asks for a pint of Harp. With A Spikey Gelled Do!

Hilarious!

Well, at the time. Which was probably about 15 years ago...

Inexplicable DeVice said...

I've just googled it (in case I was making it up), and someone else remembers it too...

Tim said...

Ha ha! I don't remember that at all! I'm glad you could find some evidence to back up your claims - or we'd all think you were a nutter!