Thursday, November 09, 2006

Party planning

So, tomorrow is my birthday.

(Waits for cheers)

Hello?

Anyway, for the first time in a couple of years I've decided to throw a little berfdee bash. In a pub. Hopefully with some friends.

A few years back I had a ... 'gathering' in the same pub as this year's event in which I conspired beforehand, along with Yaz and the lovely Lorna, to develop a theme. After some fitfull starts, Lorna and I hit the nail on the head during a trip to the cinema to see a film that may have been The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. While watching the credits, Lorna and I acted like complete children and sat there giggling at people's names. And the best one - the one that had us both crossing our legs to stop ourselves from peeing - was Courtney Vanderslice.

Which immediately made us think it was a porn star name.

And thus was born the porn star name themed birthday party.

Initially we were just going to have a bunch of white stickers and get people to write stupid slutty names on them. But then comics pal Graham started messing around in photoshop and made this amazing perverted name badge. So then we all did. And none of us did any work that day. And we might've broken the colour printer in the office printing out filth.

This was my name:


No comments are necessary here.

Everyone was given fair warning to come up with a name. And anyone who thought they could get away without thinking of one could think again. Because we created a long list of standby names, and had marker pens and stickers ready to make badges on the spot.

There were even a few spare photoshopped badges, like this one I made.

I can't remember which lucky soul got assigned this beauty.

Hilarity ensued, let me tell you.

Anyway, back to this year. Yaz and I have spent a good couple of months trying to come up with a decent theme, but really, I think we peaked a bit too early with the porn stars. And you should NEVER repeat yourself.

Eventually, we settled on a theme of sorts, although I've decided not to enforce it so strictly this time round. And what is it?

Trailer trash.

Oh yeah...

It's all My Name is Earl inspired, with initial thoughts being that I'd grow a trailer-trash stylee moustache (think Taylor Hawkins from the Foo Fighters). The thought of having to face my parents and grandparents looking like that, however, nixed that idea. My brother's really into the concept of it though; he wants to ride around the pub on a tricycle just like Earl's brother Randy did in the episode The Professor (which I would post a picture of if I could find one). I told Yaz and she said she was going to fight him for the tricycle. Who would win? Who the hell knows?

Then I was going to draw a load of moustaches, print 'em out, and make everyone wear them. But then I forgot to do it when I was last at work and I don't have a printer at home. And I'd sort of feel bad standing in the pub pointing at people shouting "PUT YER F&*£IN' MOUSTACHE ON OR GET OUT!"

Whatever! It should be a laugh anyway!!

Hurrah!

13 comments:

skillz said...

Keep an eye out, I may swing by at some point after work..!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Dora and I were out last night and found a commie mustached (complete with Lenin's face) as well as cowboy boot shaped side burns...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!

Tim said...

Skillz - Awesome! When you come in the pub look to the left-ish - there'll be a fireplace with some sofas around it. That'll be us!

Miss T - The theme's trailer trash not communist uprising!! Ha ha!!! Hey, beggars can't be choosers I s'pose - I'll accept any 'tache!!

Thanks!!! (OK, it's not actually till tomorrow, but technically you are in the future, and I'm happy to accept berfdee greetings any day of the year!

Dinah said...

Happy Birthday! Whee! Do you have a special undershirt all picked out to wear?

I thought all the talk about hitting the nail on the head might mean something else over there, and with the porn I got kind of confused, but I'm good now.

My "porn name" (first pet/childhood street) is Goldie New.

Dinah said...

I think we just posted at the exact same time! I hit send and I got a notification that you posted! Woooo, time/space mindmeld.

Tim said...

Cheers Dinah! I have a brand new white long-sleeve tee that's getting it's first airing tomorrow (probably!). Ha ha ha - and my bro got me the Earl DVD boxset - I'm all trailer-trashed up!!

Using your formula, my porn name would be Speedy Northumberland. Oh yeaaah...!

A time/space mindmeld!? Whoa! I feel like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix!!! Do I know Kung-Fu? Oh, no, I don't...

Anonymous said...

happy birthday!!!!

Dinah said...

Speedy Northumberland? Awesome!

Devine Dora said...

Happy Birthday....from the future!!!! It's not really that spooky or nothing, but you seem to enjoy it :)

Hmmm porn name parties....I'm still getting over "bam bam punani" as one of the names. My porn star name would be Sugar Knight - which is pretty classy considering I'm up against bam bam punani. My real name, in short nickname style actually also sounds like a porn name....or perhaps more like a stripper.

Tim said...

Missy & Chrissy - Thank you!!!!

Dinah - Not bad, hey? Has kind of a ... classy feel to it!!

Dora - Thank you ... woman of the fuuuuture! Sugar Knight makes you sound like a rap star!

And now, performing her new track 'Gimme trouble an' I'll bitch slap you down' is SUGAR KNIGHT!!!! YAAAAAAY!!!!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Billy Earl is my pron name...

Anonymous said...

Happy Berfdee!

You could borrow that mustache/moustouche from Miss T's a few posts back...

Have a great time this evening

IDV

Tim said...

Miss T - Billy Earl?! That's an ACE trailer trash name!!!!!

Inexplicable Device - Ha ha ha!! Nuffy Hillside - that's great!!!

Thanks - and I'm sure I will have great time! I'd thought about stealing Miss T's moustache, but it looks more like the sort of dignified one that should be worn in a members club!