Because something *always* goes wrong...

"Why on Earth would you ever need a bigger car?" Said Marcosy.

"Well... sometimes it would be handy..."

"No it wouldn't - when have you EVER needed a bigger car?"

Prophetic words if ever they were spoken...

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Jo and I arrived in the Hammersmith/Shepherds Bush area bang on 17:45 ready for the big birthday celebrations, and I parked up on the street, rather than on the trading estate where I usually park during the week when I go to work.

It would turn out to be a very wise move...

We wandered over to the pub, grabbed a drink, and plonked ourselves down on the comfy sofas that I'd reserved for the evening. We were shortly joined by comics pal Graham, then Yaz, then the flood gates opened and within half an hour we'd filled our little area to capacity. Although I wasn't drinking, I can't really remember much of what we were talking about, but a good time was certainly being had by all.

I do, however, remember Yaz saying that she'd left my present in her car, and she should go across to the trading estate where she and Marcosy had parked to get it. "No," I replied, "give it to me later!"

I also remember Jo saying around 22:30 that some cheese and mushroom wedges had made her feel a little queasy and that she was thinking about getting the tube home. "No," I replied, "the pub closes at 11, and if you wait until then I can drive you home far quicker than if you left now!"

But of course, my tiny brain had forgotten about late licensing.

We left the pub at quarter to one in the morning, and after a quick farewell in the rain we wandered back to our cars; Yaz and Marcosy back to their respective motors, me, Jo, and my bro back to mine.

Unfortunately, it seems that someone had locked the only exit to the trading estate, and Yaz and Marcosy's cars were... imprisoned!

We tried various different combinations, but nothing seemed to work. After about 40 minutes of trying a multitude of different exit strategies we had no other option but to give up. We settled on a plan by which I would leave Simon with Marcosy to shelter from the rain in Marcosy's car, while I dropped Yaz home to Ealing, with poor Jo - who was probably thinking she could've actually walked home quicker - sitting in the back watching the world go by.

Thirty minutes later I was back in Shepherds Bush to collect Simon and Marcosy. While I was gone, Marcosy had been driving his car around the trading estate like a caged tiger. He even tried to shatter the gate with sound waves from the ma-hoo-sive bass amp sitting in his boot.

That was when I reminded Marcosy that occasionally it might be handy to have a car that can seat five people. We did have a bit of a giggle as we drove Marcosy home (he lives... god - waaaaay outside London!).

So eventually, having dropped Simon and Jo off, I got home and into bed at bang on 04:10.

One day - I suspect when Yaz and Marcosy have freed their cars - we'll all laugh at this BIG TIME. But by god it was a great evening anyway!

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Highlights include:

• Sweatband ordering me to do the London Marathon next year. I just sat there shaking my head "no." Sweatband does not take "no" for an answer. I think she is trying to kill me...

• Skillz came along! Dude, I realised after you left that I owe you a beer for hosting my comics pages on your webspace and I totally didn't remember!!

• El Deanio placing a large semi-transparent red perspex vase over his groin and propositioning us all. Talk about "being prepared."

• Lee. Lee is just one of my favourite people EVAH. And now he's one of Jo's too. Actually, he seems to be forming a harem comprised solely of my lady friends...

• Lorna gave me some TimTam Balls! Have you ever had a TimTam? They're possibly the best biscuits on the planet, and now they're in ball form! How many can I fit in my mouth? Who knows - but I intend to find out later!

Twenty-nine is pretty goddamned awesome so far!