Thursday, March 13, 2008

Two


Aaaaaw, ain't he a lil' sweetheart? And then he grew up to be … me! Yep, that cheeky little bugger pictured above is me as a toddler (or thereabouts). Damn, I don't mean to be bigheaded or any more egocentric than usual, but I was as cute as a button. That picture's like an advert for a potential Abercrombie and Fitch baby range.

And look - I was even rockin' the hoody fresh out of the oven.

Anyway, so why am I posting pictures of Baby Tim? Well, it's because today is my second birthday. Not my actual second birthday - it would be impressive if a toddler could write a blog for two years, and would put IDV's constant pursuit of me in a whole new, rather unsettling light. No! It is, in fact, my second blogger bloggy-blog birthday! Good grief - can you believe I've been inflicting this nonsense on the world for two whole years - isn't it time someone stopped me? Whatever. Anyway, I thought a baby pic would be more suitable than just doing a screen grab of my first post, which really you could just look at HERE, although I would suggest you didn't bother; it was – and I know this is hard to believe – even worse than everything that's followed it. In fact, it's very clingy and needy: "ooo, come read my blog, blah blah blah."
So there we have it. I'm two. Who's going to bring me cake?

-----

To mark this historic occasion, I've decided to open the secret Sparky vault to reveal some never before seen titles and designs that I considered using before this blog evolved into the Sparky Malarkey you all know and loathe today!

Some of you might find they look just a little bit familiar… Enjoy!







(Special thanks to the Coven for unwittingly allowing me to rip their blog headers a new one, and to everyone who's stopped by over the last two years - here's to many more!)

54 comments:

Miss Smuggersham said...

Congratumalations! So it's been two years already, eh? Seems like yesterday I thought you were some nutter with a mouse picture as your icon!

Weren't you the cutest little tiny button? I just want to pinch your cute little cheeks. You were blonde!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Oh, and I loved your "Number Two Space Battles"

Sexy, Awesome!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Happy Bloggy Birthday!!

Awwww... You really were a cutiepie! I'm so glad you're not really two years old, otherwise I'd have some serious worried shrinkage going on.

Love the Blog Titles That Weren't too. Especially the Number Two Space Battles, but ESPECIALLY the I Feel... Like Someone Is Trying To Violate Me!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Eeeeek! Now it's T-Bird and me sharing the spacetime continuum!

Tim said...

T-Bird - I know! And not only was I blonde, I was VERY blonde. My bro used to say I was albino.

To think, two years ago from, well, now, I was watching The OC hoping that the finest minds in the world would come find my blog and we could discuss incredibly highbrow topics. Instead I got…

Inexplicable Device - Thanks! And you should have some serious shrinkage going on - I'm actually three!

Muwahahaha!

Cyfa said...

Yaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

It's a Midwich Cuckoo! Kill it! Kill it!!

Tim said...

*Punches Cyfa*

Shuttit!

Tara said...

Oh hey!! Congratulations and happy two-year blogiversary! And what an incredibly cute kid photo, you even had a spiffy hairdo then too! Here's to many, many, many, many and many more years of Sparky Malarkey (btw, I like the header you have on there with the handwriting)!

Dinah said...

Happy Birthday! It's so strange to think that we started blogging at the approximate same time and half a world away...You were an absolutely adorable two-yearold. The blog titles made me laugh, especially when I clicked onto Inexplicable Sparky. I remember when you looked just like little Clint Howard...you've come a long way since then.

Tara said...

Oh yeah, and I made you a virtual cake. Not as tasty as a regular one, but if I sent it to you the shipping might jostle the frosting right off of it.

missyandchrissy said...

uhoh, sparky tim is hitting his terrible two's! but congrats, and happy bloggy bday!

as we're too far to send one to you, we'll just eat cake in honor of your big day.

Tim said...

Tara - Thank you! Lots of people have commented on the photo at work; most have questioned whether it's actually me.

Glad you like the header! I was a little unsure about it after a few technical difficulties after putting it up, but I think I'll stick with it for a while at least!

Thanks for the virtual cake too!

Dinah - Spooky! We're like blog twins or something - like Joey with his hand twin in Friends.

Are you saying I'm not adorable now? I must certainly be better than kooky little Clint Howard!

Missy&Chrissy - Damn right I am! I'll be throwing my toys out the pram soon!! Enjoy your cake - let me know what you chose in celebration!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Watch out Tim, I think someone has infiltrated our vector in the S-T-C...

Tim said...

Who? Where? Do I need to bitch-slap IDV?

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Oh, I see. So, not content with "getting a room", you go and "get a space-time continuum" too.

If I may be allowed to copy: * huff *

Tim said...

Ooo, hark at Mabel! Geez… don't get your knickers in a knot!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Yeah, Mabel, you sad tw-

Oh. You mean me. How droll.

Tim said...

I totally mean you.

Zing!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Quite frankly, I am now in the running for the battle of 2008.

IDV: 2

Tim: 2

Me: 1

Tim said...

Look at you sneaking up from behind!

I meant T-Bird.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

But I am...

Tim said...

You're not T-Bird! Back in your box!

CyberPete said...

Happy blogiversary Tim

You looked a bit like a bimbo didn't you? - were you giving it up to all the girls in kindergarten?

*grins*

Miss Smuggersham said...

I am indeed sneaking up from behind...

Mwahahahahah!

Plus, is that your handwriting up there? Are you left handed?

Tim said...

Cyberpete - Ha ha, ta! Yeah, I seem to remember I always nabbed the Rolls Royce pedal car and cruised round the playground looking for mah bitches. And then I'd be all, like, "hey babe, wanna get in my car? Maybe go for a drive?"

Those were the days.

T-Bird - Damn right that's my handwriting! I used my pen tablet thing - how the hell can you tell I'm a lefty?

Miss Smuggersham said...

Because I am a lefty too. Your writing slants the same way that mine does! Must have had the wires crossed when our atoms interchanged in the transporter on the way to STC central.

Plus, remember what line of work I am in. Handwriting is something I have to look at every day...

Tim said...

A fellow lefty - wahay! We're special, T-Bird, don't you ever forget that. Isn't it irritating when your hand smudges the ink though? I hate that.

I thought it might have something to do with your line of work… you're like a teaching detective!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Smudging? Not a problem. I just hold my hand under the line I am writing so it doesn't smudge. Not like a righty where you rest your hand on the page yet to be written on.

We lefties have to make our own rules - not like those fascist righties (did I spell the f word right?).

Teaching detective? I like the sound of that. Especially if I get an Alsation called Rex who likes ham rolls. It'd be an awesome franchise - Inspectors Crotchety Spinster, Peecat and Rex.

Only the crimes we can solve are all poo and pee related...

Tim said...

T-Bird - We'll beat those goddamn righties!! DOWN WITH THE RIGHTIES, DOWN WITH THE RIGHTIES!!

I *love* the idea for Teaching Detective - that's going right on the list of awesome TV shows just needing to be made.

*cue dramatic theme tune*

"By day, she's a regular teacher in a regular school - but when the kids go home, she becomes … the Teaching Detective! Watch as the Teaching Detective and her faithful pals Peecat and Rex [insert Dallas-style three-way screen split showing Teaching Detective with Peecat and Rex on either side] solve the mysteries of who exactly did take little Alice's pencil, and whether little Jimmy did indeed eat his apple like he said he did! [Insert footage of Teaching Detective finding half an apple wedged behind lockers. Peecat and Rex look pensive]

The Teaching Detective - TONIGHT ON BBC1!"

Dinah said...

Oh god...I would TOTALLY watch the Teaching Detective.

Of course you're adorable now, Tim. That's one of those things that goes without saying but really should be said more often.

Tim said...

The Teaching Detective would be like Murder, She Wrote, Due South, and Starsky and Hutch all rolled into one. Awesome.

Bless you, Dinah. And another thing that really should be said more often: Zing!

Miss Smuggersham said...

Tim, you need to spruke that idea to the beeb!

I can't wait until we start auditioning animal and people actors to play the key roles.

Peecat's main motives are fright and flight. Plus she gets those lovely big Puss In Boots eyes when she is scared. And she pees.

I am still trying to think who can play the Crotchety Spinster.

Tim said...

I think they might snap it up; hell, it's a damn site better than most of the crap they currently show.

I'm picturing the Puss-style wide eyes and a gently-widening puddle of pee. THAT's quality television my friends.

Crotchety Spinster… IDV?

Inexplicable DeVice said...

* unfolds self from the rocking chair to shout at the kids on the lawn then returns to lonely rocking *

Wha-?

Miss Smuggersham said...

Tee hee. Do you have massive hair that's sort of a curly birds nest? That's how you'll pull off a TV version of me.

Sadly, that is such an accurate description of my hair *shakes fist* "Khaaaaan!!" I mean "huuuuumidity!!"

I am so glad I can nerd out Trek stylee here.

The Mistress said...

My second blog birthday is coming up this month too.

Therefore both of us should double bitch-slap IVD.

Tim said...

Is anyone thinking that IDV's a bit like Mr. Herbert from Family Guy? Especially when he's dressed like a woman in the fantasy where he's married to Chris…

MJ - Lets! I'm priming my bitch-slap arm as we speak!!

He won't know what's hit him - literally!

Dinah said...

I love that fantasy! Even though I'm not usually a fan of Mr. Herbert, that does make me laugh.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

* disappears into massive curly birds-nest hair for the next month *

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Good gods! Are all members of the Coven taking tunrs in the same SpaceTime Continuum?

Inexplicable DeVice said...

'turns' not 'tunrs', obviously...

Tim said...

Dinah - And you can totally see IDV like that, right?

Inexplicable Device - Realities are merging! And still you can't spell. Doofus.

Miss Smuggersham said...

Get out of my hair!!

Tim said...

It's like the worst case of nits EVAH!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

You'll need more than a nit comb and some foul smelling shampoo to get rid of me.

Mwah hah hah hah hah hah ha!

Dinah said...

Whoa! Huge upturn on the running graph!

Tim said...

Inexplicable Device - How about some clippers? Or a flame-thrower?

Dinah - Whoa! I'd not even noticed that the upturn was that big! It was a sprint finish!

eroswings said...

Happy Belated Blog Birthday, Tim! Hopefully, the time space continuum has returned to normal...otherwise, you may have to get in the Tardis and do some fixin...feel free to drop off Kylie Minogue at my place when you're done traveling ;)

Inexplicable DeVice said...

How about it? Dropping off Kylie at ErosWings' and posting this week's Hair Update?

Some of us aren't getting any younger, you know.

Well, unless we vacate this body and drop into a new one, of course.

Tim said...

Eroswings - Thank you sir! Hmmm… fix the spacetime continuum and drop off Kylie, or keep her and leave it broken… um, yeah - it's fine!

Inexplicable Device - I doubt very much that you'll ever squeeze into a new body.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

I could try squeezing into yours?

Tim said...

Ugh! I feel violated!!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

I just didn't want your ripping of my blog header to be in vain...

Tim said...

Ugh… ugh…

*voms in mouth*

*Feels even more violated*