Friday, October 17, 2008

It was bound to happen

My decent into lunacy continues. Two weeks after popping a house plant in the oven, this week I put some iPod headphones on a 30º spin cycle in the washing machine.

OK, OK, I didn't mean to do it, but the fact of the matter is that I did. I only realised when I went to head out for a run last night and I found that they weren't in their usual place in my bedroom. And then there was that awful moment of realisation where I kinda went "well, where on Earth could th- Oh." I then wandered downstairs, grabbed my shorts off the airer where they were drying and unzipped one of the pockets. There they were, all coiled up from when I popped them in there while at running club on Tuesday. On the plus side, though, they were exceedingly shiny. I actually thought they might be OK, so I grabbed my iPod, plugged 'em in and hit play. 

Have you ever heard David Bowie's Ashes to Ashes sound like it's being played underwater?

They pretty quickly went in the bin. Fortunately I have a spare pair. Which I will be Watching. Like. A. Hawk.


Talking of running club, I'm genuinely thinking that they're trying to kill me. There's a road in Richmond - a very steep road, I hasten to add - that runs up Richmond Hill. It's called Nightingale Lane and the mere mention of it is enough to drive fear into the hearts of men. 

For the second time in three weeks we ended up doing hill training in Nightingale Lane. But in contrast to the first time we did it, when we ran it in teams with plenty of rest stops, we had to do it without stopping. Up and down, up and down. Ten times. I thought my thighs were going to explode.

Adding insult to injury, we did our warm-up at the top of Richmond Hill, in clear view of the posh houses and a line of traffic. We must've looked like a speshul cold-weather line-dancing troupe while we did our side-stepping and heel-flicks.


I've spent each lunchtime this week watching episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia on my iPhone, having downloaded the second season off iTunes last weekend (note to self: is 'watching TV in Starbucks' the new 'I'm writing in Starbucks to be seen in public, writing'?) I think I have full-on hetero man-love for this show. It's hilarious in a very twisted, 'I can't believe they'd do that' kinda way. Charlie Day is a comedy god. I've tried scouring youtube for some clips to show you how great it is, but out of context of a full episode I think it's difficult to really appreciate it. 

What I did find, though, was this behind the scenes clip which gives an idea of the sort of humour at play in the show … although I recommend caution if you're at all uneasy about DeVito-based nudity…


Whoop-whoop! Nerdgasm imminent! Whoop-whoop! 

So, the first official pictures from the new Star Trek movie came out this week and I thought I'd quickly mention my thoughts on it (on a purely professional basis, you understand).

Well, my first impression, courtesy of Entertainment Weekly's cover image was … well, actually it was "Whoa! Back away from the photoshop – I said: BACK. AWAY. FROM. THE. PHOTOSHOP!" Seriously, someone really went to town on smoothing Zachery Quinto's face out. He looks like he was rendered in CGI. But that's what over-enthusiastic photoshopping can do for ya, and every other image I've seen has given me proper tingles in special places. 

I mean, look at this pic. Just from what I see here I think Chris Pine is going to make a fine Kirk, and from that pose I'd say that Keith Urban has nailed McCoy in a way I'd never have believed possible. From what I can see the bridge looks awesome too; different, yes, but it had to be, didn't it? (note to naysayers: c'mon, did you really think a $165 million movie was going to use a recreation of something from the 1960s? No, of course it wasn't!)

Well over a year ago I wrote about my hopes for this new movie, and I'm pleased to say that everything I've seen so far suggests that JJ Abrams and his team have done a fine job. Which makes it all the more annoying when you read comments from so-called fans saying that they hope the film fails because it's playing hard and fast with the continuity of the Star Trek universe. I find it difficult to understand how people can say these sort of things without actually having seen the movie, and seeing as none of us are going to see it until next May, I'll politely ask anyone who makes such comments to me to shut the f**k up and just be grateful we're getting a new Star Trek film. 

By all means, if, come next May we discover that the movie truly does suck, please feel free to rip it a new one. But I genuinely don't think it will, and I look forward to seeing what I think, on this initial, admittedly very small glimpse of the first new piece of Star Trek in over three years, will be a really rather wonderful movie.

Now, can we have a picture of Leonard Nimoy as Spock please?


Damn me. I've got a … I s'pose you'd call it a little urge. And I fed it by looking at a special website. Which is where I found this.

Anyone who knows me knows that I want a Mini Clubman. And I'd not even planned on considering a used one (or 'cherished' one, as Mini call it). But I was being nosy on the Mini website the other day and I saw this one. And it's oh so pretty in a snarly "I will eat your babies, bitch!"* kinda way. I'm actually in love with those anthracite wheels. Visually it's not anything like what I'd planned on going for when I eventually get round to buying one (I especially didn't want to go for a red one as both my Minis have been red - and viper stripes? Puh-lease), but my interest has been piqued. It's done about 3500 miles, and it's packed out with more toys and gadgets than I'd ever think about speccing on one.

I'm very tempted to go take a looksy…

*New favourite quote from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.


Tara said...

Your running club is trying to make your thighs explode, and my new-found Denise Austen tape is trying to make my hips and stomach explode. I think they say that seven days after watching that tape, you get a phone call and an eerily cheerful voice comes on and says, "Feel free to stop for a few seconds to catch your breath and then catch up to me! Don't forget to breathe!"

I don't want to see any DeVito nudity. It was bad enough seeing Dennis Franz's nudity when I was hooked on NYPD Blue.

CyberPete said...

Well Kirk (I think it was, the blonde one sitting down with his legs apart, right?) gives me proper tingles in special places too.

There is way too much photoshop going on these days. Poor people, being deemed not suitable for the public without looking like freaks of nature.

Love the Mini. There is one outside my window, a blue one with a white roof. It's so cute. I want one.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

* wipes nerdgasm jizz from face *

Dammit! Didn't duck in time.

I'm hoping that when the lights are off (or on standby) on the bridge, it'll be all black surfaces and jewelled buttons. Mmmm... Retro!

That MINI Clubman does look kinda cool, although you're right about the colour and Viper stripes. What colour would you prefer? I think a dark metallic blue or green with the black roof would be awesome.

Oh, just a reminder: You seem to have omitted pics of your thighs. I'm sure you just forgot, yes?

Tim said...

Tara - They're all out to get us!

*looks conspiratorially around*

They could be anywhere!

Don't worry about the DeVito nudity, it's not … full nudity or anything like that. It's more psychologically disturbing than properly disturbing.

Cyberpete - I'm guessing that my special tingles and your special tingles are for entirely different reasons, hmmm?

Inexplicable Device - I'm betting it won't!

The Clubman does look cool, which is funny because it's got bits on it - like the extra fog lamps and the viper stripes - that I've never been particularly fond of. I think it's the wheels. I'm a sucker for those wheels.

My preferred colour combo are dark blue and silver, or hot chocolate and silver. Although Pepper white and black and Astro black and silver have grown on me.

Sorry, blogger, um, crashed when I tried to upload the thigh pics. And anyway, who wants to see pictures of exploded thigh anyway?

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Damn Blogger!

That hot chocolate colour is quite nice. Soothing, even. But classy.
I've been seduced by an Alfa GT with the £15,000 8C paint job - Of course, I can't afford to pay such a ridiculous amount for pretty paint, mores the pity.

Tim said...

Ooo, I like the GTs. Buy it. Go on. Just buy it.

CyberPete said...

Dammit! I thought for a second there, our tingles were for the same reasons.

I like the dark blue and silver combo.

Tim said...

Our tingles didn't mingle.

CyberPete said...

Tears on my pillow, caused by youuuuuuu...

Tim said...


I hope they dry quickly.

CyberPete said...

I'm sure I'll survive.

Just like that song.

T-Bird said...

IDV, what does nerdgasm jizz taste like? I'm thinking bitterness and tears.

Dude, why is that mini clubman a little bit long in the boot? Is it some special sort of mini for people with a need for junk in the trunk?

Geexz. I am away for a while and get all potty mouthed.

Tim said...

Cyberpete -I'm sure you will - because you're a trooper, that's why!

T-Bird - OMG! Da internetz is fixed!!

Those would be IDV's own tears he's tasting, yes?

Mini Clubman's are longer than regular Minis (about a foot or so); they're the not so mini Mini. Curiously, though, they actually still not that practical…

We likes it when ya potty-mouth plays toooooo!

CyberPete said...

I sure am a trooper. I troop with the best of them.

Are there still only two seats in a Mini Clubman?

Tim said...

You get the option of having either two or three seats in the back of a Clubman, but I think I'd go for just the two as I think three would be a bit of a squeeze!

CyberPete said...

I would go for two seats aswell, less is more.

How small is the trunk?

Tim said...

It's a smidgeon bigger than the one in the regular hatch.

Which means you can get four modestly-packed shopping bags in the boot rather than three.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

T-Bird: It tastes more of frustration than bitterness, but still salty from tears.
Yes, Tim, my tears were mingled in there, too.

CyberPete said...

well, that's something. So you can do some shopping at Morrisons or do you shop at Sainsbury's ?

Tim said...

Inexplicable Device - Well lap it up, cos that's all you're gettin'!

Cyberpete - Morrisons!? How dare you! I'm a Sainsbury's chap I'll have you know!

Although Morrisons do have some fantastic bargains…

CyberPete said...

We have to take greater care what we spend our hard earned cash on these days, with the credit crunch and all.

I heard that an obscene amount of people are going to lose their jobs in London. They have to start shopping at Tesco or Asda or something.

Tim said...

Or worse still - Lidl!

CyberPete said...

Oh god no. We have that here but I would never set foot in one. I'll never be that poor.

I have been to Aldi once. A very
traumatic experience. You know, they hardly sell any label things.

Tim said...

How awful for you. I've never been in one, and don't plan to start now.

CyberPete said...

good idea, it's dreadful. Nobody should be that poor.

I had a friend who isn't poor at all but she only shopped at Aldi. It's not why we don't speak anymore but then again it's one of the reasons why she is a complete loon, I'm sure.

T-Bird said...

Guys, mental images of tears and other bodily fluids mingling in a sobbing mess is why I missed my internets so much.

By the way, I just finished season one of Phillie during the week. There's a lot I'd missed out on, and I am totally girl crushing on Sweet D.

Tim said...

Cyberpete - Well it's definitely grounds for ending a friendship…

T-Bird - Sobbing messes is what we do bestest!

Oh my god - you are the FIRST person I know who has actually watched it! It's so awesome, isn't it!? I want to be Charlie just so I can raise my voice and shout like him!

CyberPete said...

Well I'd say so.

The shame!

T-Bird said...

Charlie is sort of sexy in a very deranged way. I'd seen most of season one on telly, but it was late at night, so I wasn't really all that conscious. Thanks to you though, I've been watching and loving.

My favourite ep from season one was "Charlie gets an Abortion".

I always knew right to lifers were into crazy freaky good times.

Tim said...

Cyberpete - There's nothing wrong with ending a friendship over a supermarket. Although I'd hardly call Lidl 'super.'

T-Bird - Oh god, I *love* 'Charlie gets an Abortion'! I think that's my favourite episode full stop. Did you know Autumn Reeser is in it? She's the one Mac get's snuggily with, and who eggs Dennis when he tries to climb the fence.

Lordy, she can hurl her eggs at me any day of the week.

Inexplicable DeVice said...