Monday, June 06, 2011

Brace yourselves

So, last week I did something I haven't done in years: I wore a pair of braces (that's 'suspenders' to my friends across the pond). The reasons for this essentially boil down to the following:

• I've been trying to shake my wardrobe up for a while now.
• This seemed like an interesting way of doing it.

The last time I wore braces I think I was about four years old and they were red and yellow striped with little red and yellow cars on the clasps. I distinctly remember that the cars - I believe they were VW Beetles - made me very happy; on the downside, I possessed a distinct inability to attach or detach the cars clamped to my little trousers which led to several urine-based incidents and a parental vow that the youngest son would only be wearing belts or trousers with an elasticated waist until he was old enough to know better.

Seriously, why I felt the need to undo them completely rather than just unhook them from my little shoulders I'll never know.

So anyway, yes, last week I thought I'd give braces another go. Sadly no little red and yellow cars this time, though; instead I had to make do with an all black pair (I know: DISASTER). But you know what? I loved them. They made me feel particularly sophisticated and masculine (something I doubt little cars would do, however awesome they might be). What's more, I received lots of compliments throughout the day from swooning colleagues, and only had to contend with two 'witty' remarks comparing me to Cannon and Ball, both of which came within 30 seconds of one another, and both of which I dispatched with an arched eyebrow, possibly a swear, and definitely a threat to take off my braces and beat those responsible with the metal ends.

I also managed to resist the temptation to twang them for comedy purposes, which would've no doubt resulted in a painful laceration to the nips - and even better: I didn't pee myself.

All in all then it was a successful sartorial experiment, and one I shall happily repeat.

6 comments:

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Ah, braces. Either cute or catastrophe.

I'm thinking you fell into the cute category?

Sorry. I meant the 'sophisticated and masculine' category, of course...

Tim said...

I can do cute. Next time I wear them I'll get someone to take a photo and we can do a poll or something.

Princess said...

Next you'll be wearing a funny red nose and a curly wig with your suspenders...to add that extra touch of sophistication and manliness.

Oh I almost forgot... you have already done the red nose thing.....

Jason said...

Wait a minute...Is this the lifestyle choice thing you tweeted about?

Tara said...

I didn't wear suspenders as a kid, but I do remember belts, overalls and faulty zippers, and those were not easy to take off when you have tiny, clumsy fingers and your bladder is in panic mode.

Pay no attention to the smart assy fashion amateurs. I'm sure you looked extra awesome in those black braces.

Tim said...

Princess - I think I'm done with the red nose thing - at least for the time being!

Jason - Uh-uh…

Tara - I did! I can't wait to wear them again. Which is a bit sad, really…