Monday, May 04, 2009


It feels like ages since I last posted anything (although in reality it was just last Thursday), and to be honest I've not really felt like it. The accident last week really knocked me for six; first of all there was the utter shock of it actually happening, then there was a period where my brain just kind of shut down and went into some kind of safe mode where I could only deal with specific things I needed to do, such as 'get home,' 'call the insurance company,' and 'fall to pieces.'

Actually 'call the insurance company' was a good one. In contrast to many others, I've actually always been really pleased with the company I insure my car with; unfortunately, they lost points this time round when, having gone through all the details of the accident and really needing to go sit down and have a cup of tea so sugary that the spoon would literally stand upright in it, the lady on the other end of the line said "ooo, before you go, could you just hang on for a sec so I can put you through to someone who'll conduct a customer satisfaction survey?"

I literally went: "WHAT?!"

And she said: "A customer satisfaction survey."

And I said: "Um, no."

And she said: "Oh go on - it only takes two minutes."

To which I replied: "Um, no - I've just been in a car accident and I'd really like to go and sit down."

And she said: "*Tut* Oh, OK. Well, have a nice day."

And if I could've reached down the phone line and throttled her I really would have.

Another person who looses points is a friend of mine who DROVE PAST THE SCENE OF THE ACCIDENT and didn't stop to see if I was alright. What he did do, though, was text me about half an hour later to tell me that I was doing a good job of clearing debris off the road and could consider a new career as a road sweeper if push came to shove. Nice. And he wasn't the only one; upon hearing what happened, another friend sent me a text with a sarcastic comment. My response to both was something along the lines of 'you can f**k right off'; I'd like to see how they'd like it if the same thing had happened to them, although it's certainly a novel way of gauging who your real friends are.

Anyway, over the course of the last week I genuinely feel like I've gone through something like the five stages of grief; I flew through denial on the first day, anger … well, I'm still feeling that a bit, bargaining … no, I think I skipped that one, depression, yes, still hitting that one rather a lot, and finally acceptance - I accept it happened and there's nothing I can do it about it now.

On the plus side, Clubbie's in the best possible place and will be repaired to absolute factory freshness (I cannot thank the people at my Mini dealer enough - they are utter stars). As for me, well, I have a loan car that I cannot get at all enthusiastic about despite the fact it is a decent car, and waaaaay better than the shitty little toy I was going to get given originally. I think my lack of enthusiasm comes down to the fact that people keep asking me how I like it, and how they 'bet it makes a nice change to what I normally drive.' Um, no, not really; in an ideal world I'd never set foot in the loan car, and if I'd wanted a car like it I would've bought one in the first place.

As for me, well I'm not going to beat around the bush: I hurt. Sometimes I get up and I hurt straight away, other times I get up feeling normal, then the pain gradually hits around midday and gets worse as the day goes on. Either way, by the evening I just want to lie down, which I inevitably do. It's been a long weekend in the UK, and I've spent the vast majority of it horizontally, either laid out on the sofa, laid out on the bed, or, if I'm round Sparky Ma and Pa's, laid out on the floor. Unfortunately, laying oneself out anywhere doesn't really help the pain go away, but on the plus side it does give you a different perspective on the world.

What I'm really annoyed about, though, is the fact that I can't go running. I'd taken a break because of the muscle strain a few weeks back, then I got flu (not pig flu, thankfully), then I got whiplash. All that good training I've done this year has been for nothing; my Nike+ dude is taunting me, my Nike+ 2009 resolutions have been shot to hell, and the Dysart Dash is less than two months away! This was supposed to be the year in which I ran it like a cheetah, but now I'm looking at the prospect of playing catch-up big time. I'm not happy.

I saw the doctor last week and he told me to buy some Tiger Balm to rub on my back and neck. Tiger Balm is an ointment that comes in a tiny tiny pot, costs rather a lot for the amount you get, and makes your skin feel like it's on fire. I was immediately disappointed to find that, while it's packaged to look like it's some mysterious ointment from the Far East, it's actually made in Manchester. Anyway, I'm not convinced it's actually doing anything, but I must say I'm getting rather addicted to the sensation it gives, although I do live in fear that I might at some point forget to wash my hands after applying it and accidently get some on my penis.

So, the result of this, dear reader, is that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the lack of posts, I'm sorry for the lack of enthusiasm. But don't fear! With a bit of luck my enthusiasm levels will be boosted in the next week or so. Why? Well, a) I'm hoping the pain will get better, b) there's a chance that Clubbie may make a triumphant return, and c) there's a little thing called the new Star Trek movie…


the projectivist said...

goodness me!
you're sounding quite poorly there, Tim. if you lived around the corner i'd have popped around with some of my best brownies and whipped you up one of your favourite milkshakes.

i hope you begin to feel better soon.

CyberPete said...

I think you deserve a hug!

And better friends?

I'm rubbish at expressing my sympathies but I really wish you a speedy recovery. It's no wonder you felt like you got the wind knocked out of you, anybody would. It takes time to catch it again but the thing is, it always comes back.

*friendly manly hug with no funny business*

Ponita in Real Life said...


Men.... really.

Tiger Balm??? What kind of a doctor prescribes Tiger Balm??


You probably have whiplash, honey... not something that will go away with a little linament. Plus Clubbie's attacker's insurance should pay for your medical bills, shouldn't it?

Please report back to Nurse Ponita when you have seen a physiotherapist (ie: within 24 hours) OR ELSE!!!

Tim said...

The Projectivist - Funnily enough, I feel a bit better after venting here (mentally, I mean; the neck still hurts). Ooo - brownies!

Cyberpete - Man hugs with no funny business happily received!

Ponita - He also recommended I sleep with a scarf round my neck to support it!

No probably about it, he diagnosed whiplash within about a minute of me stepping in the door. Technically the other person's insurance *should* pay for things like this, but we haven't got to the assigning blame stage yet (yes, it's actually in question), so everything's coming out of my pocket at the moment. I've been given the name of an osteopath, so I'm going to look into that. I don't think my back's ever been quite right since the last time it happened, so I'm definitely going to get it checked out.

Tara said...

Before reading the last two paragraphs, I was going to ask a really stupid question - was gonna ask if you went to see a doctor. I'm glad you did, but you probably need more of a remedy than tiger balm. You will feel better, but I'm sorry that it has put things on hold for you like a good, therapeutic run.

I can't believe that "friend" of yours drove past you when you had just had the accident! And then texted you? GRRR.

Ponita in Real Life said...

A scarf??? What kind of witch doctor do you see???

In my professional opinion (and one who has suffered grievous injury to her back from a horse related accident), you need physiotherapy... now. Not an osteopath, not Tiger Balm... You need something that will decrease the inflammation, help heal the injury and get you on the road to recovery.

Don't wait, Tim. The longer you wait, the more scar tissue will form, the less 'normal' your neck and back will be in the future. Speed is of the essence with any injury. (I Cannot stress this enough...)

So look one up, make an appointment, and get your cute little ass to a physio asap!

Tim said...

Tara - Actually I feel a lot better today. Must've been theraputic writing about it! And yes, I'm not impressed by that friend…!

Ponita - I will! I will!!

iPandah said...

Aw :0( Hugs buddy, can't believe those people who drove past, nobbers. I'm sorry you feel naff, I know how it feels and it truly does suck, and I've never got that hire car thing where people think you're going to be in some way excited about driving something else?!! Will post off that ST stuff I told you about tomorrow, it's not overly exciting but you might like it :0)

Tim said...

Bless you dude, bless you!

I must send you some of that Starbucks VIA too!!

missyandchrissy said...

awh, i'm so sorry that you are hurting! hopefully the scary tiger balm is helping at least a little and you're starting to feel better already.

and know that next week is going to be much better!

Tim said...

I definitely think I'm getting a little bit addicted to Tiger Balm…