The postman only gets crushed once

When I got home from work on Tuesday I found a Royal Mail card on the floor informing me that they'd tried to deliver a package but I wasn't in. Odd, I thought; I'd not ordered anything - and even when I do I have it sent to work. Was this another case of stupid previous owner of Sparky Towers having something sent to my house again? I was momentarily outraged until I noticed the name on the card was definitely mine. 

Intriguing…

So I hopped online and arranged for the package to be delivered on Saturday. And on Friday night I set multiple alarm clocks because I have a habit of sleeping in until about 11am at the weekend.

Saturday morning arrived and I woke at just gone 8am, rubbing my eyes and yawning like a newborn kitten. Then I glanced out the window and saw postie just over the road. Eeek, I thought, jumping out of bed and pulling some trousers on while somehow managing not to fall over in a comedy-stylee. Then I ran downstairs, and put the kettle on just in time to hear:

RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGG!

OK, postie-dude, I know from past experience that you know I'm highly unlikely to be up at that time in the morning, but really, that was just a little excessive. I did, however, manage to get my own back because the postie was evidently unaware that Sparky Tower's front door opens outward, and as he was leaning down to perhaps try and hide the mystery package behind a malnourished tree I recently bought, I opened the door and crushed him between the door and the front of the house.

"Huk!" he muttered, before extricating himself and handing me two packages in a somewhat disgruntled fashion.

The sender of the first package was evident from the name on the box - my electrickery company. 

But what the hell had they sent? A hamster and a wheel so I could generate my own power? I did what any intrigued individual would do and opened it.

Ooo, two free* energy-saving light bulbs. Wicked - I needed some of them.

The second package was the more mysterious of the two. An unmarked jiffy-bag… I carefully eased this one open just incase it was some sort of incendiary device from a disgruntled blog reader - but no, it was in fact a response to a request I made a few weeks back.

Someone had sent me the Batmobile I so desperately yearned  for.

OK, so it's not quite:

But beggers can't be choosers, so thank you very much, not-so mysterious stalker stranger. The chances of me following through on my promise to dress as Batman though, are, it must be said, slim to none. And by 'slim to none' I actually mean 'none.'

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Always one to pay an unwanted, unnecessary, backhanded compliment/insult, Big Bro turned round to me on Saturday evening just as I was leaving the parents' house and told me I looked like fast-talking, semi-retarded Radio 1 DJ Zane Lowe. I'm not sure I see it myself.

Oh, and for anyone unfamiliar with Zane Lowe, imagine reading this post, and in fact this blog in its entirety, without any full-stops, spaces between words, or pausing for breath and you'll get the gist of his style.

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After waiting what seems like an age since it was released in the States (a month ago), the new album from one of my very favourite bands, Phantom Planet, finally got a UK release today - so I rushed out first thing this morning to pick up a copy. And my verdict on Raise the Dead? Awesome. I really think this is their best album to date - 12 cracking, catchy, pop-rock tracks of a consistently high standard. Their last album, the self-titled Phantom Planet, has been a constant presence in slot 1 of my in-car CD player for the last four years, but it's just been displaced by the new one. I'm going to encourage you all to go to their MySpace page to check out their stuff, and if you're too lazy to do that, check this out:

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My brief shopping expedition was also well worth it for another reason - I finally got the gorgeous new Incase Slider case for my iPhone! Problems arose, however, when I got home and tried to remove my iPhone from the chunky case I'd bought when I got the phone: it was stuck.

I tried for ages to get it out (not surprising bearing in mind how difficult it had been to get it in in the first place - which is why I'd left it in there since buying it back in February), and in the end I had to resort to twisting the thing until it broke off. It's now so twisted that it won't shut properly; it looks a bit like Burt Reynold's face. Which is a bit of a shame as I was going to offer it to a fellow iPhone user - the case, I mean, not Burt Reynold's face.

Still, mine now looks even more awesome than before. Good times.

*Note to self - make sure they haven't invoiced you for them on the next bill.