Friday, January 07, 2011

Smart arse

As happens every now and then, I woke up this morning and thought 'do you known what? Let's make an effort today.' And by that I mean I actually dressed nice. How nice? I put on a freakin' tie, people.

All of which means I braced myself for the inevitable sarcastic comments from my work colleagues. Hell, let's call them my scruffy work colleagues because quite frankly I was a vision of jaunty awesomeness in comparison. An hour into the day - I know, I was surprised I had to wait so long - and the first comment came.

"You look … smart today."

I almost did a comedy double take. A compliment?! Mmmm, what you say?

"You look like…" - Here we go, I thought - "Brandon Flowers from The Killers."

Oh, hang on, that actually was a compliment. Shame, really, because I had some decent witty retorts prepped and ready to go. Shit. For once lost for words, I just sheepishly adjusted the knot of my tie; if I'd been wearing a cap I would've doffed it.

But then, of course, my boss turned up.

"Oh, Tim, you do look smart today, with the… [mimes tie adjustment]. What's the special occasion?"

"No special occasion," I reply. "I just felt like it."

But because he's that sort of person, bless him, he couldn't just stop there.

"You look like…" At which point I think 'oh, here we go,' and boss lady upstairs shouts down "just stop there!" Boss man ignores her and carries on regardless because, well, he's the boss and he can do whatever he likes.

"You look like you're in a boy band."

"Oh, um, thanks," I say, rolling my eyes.

"No, sorry, I didn't mean it like that - you look like you're a member of a reformed boy band."

Boss lady comes scurrying downstairs and shouts "WHEN YOU'RE IN A HOLE - STOP DIGGING!" Boss then wanders off, leaving me standing there thinking 'I'm not even A-grade boy band material, I'm desperate reforming-for-the-money-grade boy band.' Oh the shame.

On the plus side, at least no one snapped their fingers and yelled "GARCON!" at me.


Princess said...

Take That? Weatlife? East 17?
The jackson 5? Boyzone? which one was boss man meaning?

Oh Garcon! I'd like a latte please.

CyberPete said...

I've fancied the pants off Brandon Flowers. At least until he went solo. The look is hot though.

Reformed boy band? That can only mean one thing. Wait for it..

NKOTB or maybe Bros?

Tara said...

Ah, coworkers...bless their hearts.

Don't let that scare you off, though. Wear your ties with style.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Take That reformed, and they're not to be sniffed at.
Perhaps you could oust Robbie and take his place?

CyberPete said...

IDV no, no. Nobody's replacing Robbie. How about the unwashed looking one who used to have long hair. Howard or Howie or Harold.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

No! Howard stays. I like him!!

Little Mark can go, though.

Tim said...

Has my blog just turned into somewhere where you boys spend your time arguing over who's the prettiest member of Take That?


CyberPete said...

Apparently so, Tim.

As it turns out I don't really know the names of the members of Take That but if we keep Robbie, Mark (I think I kind of like him? He was the one with the skimpy tops back in the day?) and Howard (UGH!). Then who is left to be booted?

I hate compromising.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Shhh, Tim. 'Petra and I are having a conversation!

Yes, Mark was he of the skimpy tops. The only two left to mention are Gary (Bleeuch! Although, he's not looking so bad now) and Jason (Mostly YUM! but very occasionally hideous depending on the camera angle).

Tim said...


Inexplicable DeVice said...

So, who do you think is the prettiest member of Take That, Tim?

Tim said...

I HATE them all.

CyberPete said...


If I had to decide, Howard is still the weakest link. Sorry, how can you fancy him?

C'mon Tim, we know you secretly love the lads. Fess up.