LACK action!

Today has been dominated by two shopping expeditions born out of necessity: the first was a quick jaunt to Kingston on an urgent mission to buy a new wallet after the zip bust on my previous one and all my change kept emptying out everywhere whenever I took it out of my pocket. The replacement is a cool Rip Curl wallet in a tasteful chocolate brown. 

Mmmm - nice!

Several hours later, and almost two years after the inaugural annual IKEA-day, Jo and I headed to Wembley to fulfill my desire for some hot red LACK action, made necessary by the fact that I bought a printer the other week and I keep worrying that I'll step on it if I leave it on the floor for much longer. Plus, it looks a bit trampy if you leave random pieces of computer equipment scattered across the floor, right?

Good. Times. 

Also good was the fact that Jo didn't intend to spend any money and I somehow convinced her to spend more than I did. I did almost buy a big plant thingy, but was put off by the fact that all the ceramic pots they had to put them in were ugly. And by 'ugly' I actually mean 'UUUUG-leeeeeee.'

Oh, and in other matters, it appears as if IKEA have named a new item after me.

Some old dude gave me massive evils when I took this picture (I think he thought I was taking a picture of him).

Anyway, that's all of little importance, because in Aisle 6, Location 3 the prophecy was finally fulfilled and I got my grubby little mits on a bright red LACK. Several minutes later I handed over £7.99 and the LACK was mine. 

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A little under an hour later I was home and aching to assemble my LACK, while also fielding text messages from Willowc who wanted to know where Mick Jagger lives. LACK assemblage was not without its problems, however…

The LACK in its PACK(aging).

The LACK is shrink-wrapped in plastic. This needs to be pierced with a pointed finger or other firm appendage.

The LACK includes four doubled-ended screws. These are of great importance.

The LACK also includes four legs. These are also of great importance.

This is the main bit of the LACK. If you've bought a LACK and this is not included, you may want to contact customer services.

The instructions, stuck on the underside of the main part of the LACK, are pretty straightforward: screw legs onto main bit. Easy enough, you might think.

Attempting to screw the double-ended screws into the holes proves somewhat difficult, however, because the holes are too small, and the thread leaves an interesting, some might say "painful," indentation on your fingers.

Fortunately, I'm not just a pretty face; I whack one of the legs onto the screw and just damn-well screw the bastard on.

One leg…

…Two legs (and some Tim-leg supporting action because it was sliding around a bit)…

…Three legs…

…Four!

And finally the little red LACK complete!

So I've finally got a little red LACK. It's in place now, with mah printer on top, and it looks great. The question now is: do I go all Pokemon and collect them all…?